Bedrooms and Couches
by DaughterOfAres
Summary: Jack visits Sharon for the last time. Sharon has to deal with the aftermath and trauma. With an appearance from Brenda Leigh Johnson. UPDATE: I posted this story in completion. I'm changing my mind. Well, more like, I'm adding a few scenes, and doing some editing. I'll be sure to mention at the beginning of each chapter if there's new content
1. The Rape

Thank you all so much for the wonderful reviews for Dirty Dishes and Telephones! This story is nothing like those two. :) I feel as though I should apologize because this is so completely non-canon. But it popped into my head, and with the help of sally martin, Sixty Five Roses, and Lady Lanera it turned into a story.

**UPDATE!:** So, I posted this story in completion. I'm changing my mind. Well, more like, I'm adding a few scenes, and doing some editing. I'll be sure to mention at the beginning of each chapter if there's new content, so you don't have to reread it if you don't want to. There's no new content in this chapter, btw.

WARNING: This story does involve nongraphic descriptions of the aftermath of a rape.

* * *

**Bedrooms and Couches**

**The Rape**

"You didn't have to walk me all the way up here," Rusty said with the typical 'I'm not a baby' tone teenagers have, as they rode the elevator up to Sharon's floor.

"Oh, it's no bother," Brenda Leigh Johnson replied smiling. "I didn't get a chance to talk to Sharon much before Fritz and I took you to the movies."

"Because you don't see her enough at work," Fritz remarked with knowing exasperation. Sharon had been working late, wrapping up a case, so Brenda had offered to take her friend's foster son to the movies.

"I don't!" Brenda argued mildly indignant as they stepped out of the elevator. "I was only just sworn in as Chief of Police a week ago after not working at the LAPD for over a year."

"Whatever you say, honey," Fritz replied, clearly placating his wife.

The mere second the teenager saw Fritz kiss Brenda's temple a moment later, Rusty made a face but continued towards Sharon's door. "You two are weird."

The couple only smiled, knowingly. A few moments later, Brenda moved to knock on Sharon's door. However, she stopped short when she noticed that the door was open slightly.

"Fritz…"

"I see it," he replied quietly, already pulling his gun out of his holster as Brenda did the same beside him.

"What? What is it?" Rusty then craned his head around to see what it was that Brenda and Fritz saw exactly, but they blocked his view. "What's wrong?" Rusty said, panicking slightly at the suddenly solemn attitude of the two law enforcement officers.

"Stay here," Brenda and Fritz ordered at the same time.

"But…"

"Rusty! Stay here!" Brenda ordered in her best Chief's voice.

With a worried pout, Rusty backed up against the opposite wall. He had learned long ago that it was in his best interests to follow her orders and not ask questions when she used _that_ voice. The same went for Sharon as well.

With both of their guns drawn now and at the ready, Brenda nodded to Fritz. Slowly, he pushed the door open with one hand and swiftly proceeded into the Captain's home with Brenda close behind. To discourage Rusty from following, Brenda quickly closed the door behind her.

"Sharon? It's Brenda!" she called out in the dark room. "Is this a bad time?"

There was no reply, however.

Slowly, Fritz and Brenda then advanced through the small apartment, visually checking each area for any signs of foul play, clues to where Sharon could be, or intruders before they moved onto the next room. It wasn't long before the couple found the captain of Major Crimes. Reaching her bedroom, they found her door wide open. Fritz took a step inside to quickly make sure the room was clear and then promptly swore. He heard Brenda's gasp beside him a moment later, knowing that she had seen it as well.

"I'll clear the rest of the apartment," Fritz stated before he, moved out of the bedroom.

With Fritz out of the room now, Brenda rapidly moved towards the bed, her gun holstered, and pulled out her cell phone to call 911. Only one ambulance would be needed, though. For lying on top of a brutally beaten Sharon Raydor, captain of Major Crimes, was a naked man who was very obviously dead.

As Brenda talked to the 911 operator, she removed the gag from Sharon's mouth. She tried not to show her disgust when she noticed the makeshift gag was a pair of underwear, probably the underwear Sharon had been wearing when she was attacked.

"Get him off me," Sharon demanded, her voice unusually high yet gruff, as she pushed against the body on top of her with her free hand. Her other hand was handcuffed to the bedpost, which made Brenda briefly wonder if the handcuffs used were Sharon's own.

Fritz returned just as Brenda was trying to roll the dead man off Sharon. He quickly stepped into action and helped his wife. Neither he nor Brenda cared when the dead man rolled off the bed and landed with sickeningly wet thud on the floor.

As soon as Sharon was free from the dead man, Brenda saw Sharon bite back her pain. Brenda herself had to fight back the bile that rose in her throat as she saw the damage that the body had hid from view before. She'd seen plenty of dead bodies with this sort of damage before without flinching, but Sharon wasn't just another victim. She was her friend.

"I'll get Rusty and call Provenza," Fritz said, covering any emotion he felt very well.

"No!" Sharon shouted as she moved to sit up despite the pain and tried to cover her exposed lower half with a blood-stained sheet. "Do not bring Rusty in here. He doesn't need to see this."

Always the professional, Fritz looked directly into Sharon's eyes and spoke as though she weren't more than half naked and covered with all manner of bodily fluids. "I promise, Sharon, I won't bring him into the room," he said calmly. "I'll just bring him to the living room while we wait for the ambulance."

Sharon nodded slightly while trying to hide her shaking.

Fritz looked briefly at Brenda, unspoken words passed between them before he left the room again.

"Sharon. Sharon, listen to me," Brenda said firmly, trying to refocus her friend's attention. "Are those your cuffs? Do you know where the key is?"

Sharon nodded and swallowed painfully. "In my purse. Jack dumped it out somewhere…"

"Jack?" Brenda questioned, as she moved to the discarded purse she spotted on the floor and searched for the key to the cuffs. "You know him?"

Sharon nodded, and Brenda could see her struggle to stay as calm as possible. "He's my husband."

Brenda froze and swallowed hard before picking up the keys and moving back to the bed to unlock the cuff from Sharon's hand. It wasn't as easy as it should have been. The cuffs were slick with blood from Sharon's own wrist since she had struggled against her attacker. Not to mention, Sharon couldn't control her shaking, but finally the cuffs were off.

"Your husband?" Brenda breathed, feeling her gut contract painfully at the disturbing thought that it had been someone Sharon had cared for that had done this heinous crime.

Sharon practically pushed Brenda out of the way as she moved off the bed, and away from Jack's body. Grabbing her robe off the chair with hands that refused to stop shaking, Sharon pulled it on, tying it tightly around her middle.

"Jack stopped by," Sharon started to explain without prompting. She felt as though she needed to say something. To explain what had happened. Maybe if she said it out loud it would hurt less. "He was upset about the divorce papers he'd been served with. After a nearly thirty year legal separation, he was surprised I wanted a divorce." She snorted in bitter disbelief, trying to stop her whole body from trembling. "I let him in to talk before I realized he'd been drinking...again."

Brenda slowly approached and cautiously put an arm around her friend. She briefly wondered if Sharon realized how unsteady she looked on her feet. "Do you want to sit down?"

Sharon nodded, unable to make eye contact with the newest Chief of Police. "He's never been a violent drunk. Never. I swear he's never done anything like this before." The realization that she sounded like every battered wife the police had ever spoken to made her stop speaking. But it was true. Jack would yell from time to time, so would she for that matter, but he had never laid a hand on her. He'd never hit her, or…forced her to do anything she hadn't wanted to do.

Brenda helped Sharon down to sit against the wall and merely held her friend; it was all she could do really. She doubted Sharon was even aware that they were sitting against the wall. "I know. You wouldn't have let him in your front door if you'd thought for a second he could be dangerous. Especially, when you knew Rusty could be home at any minute."

Sharon nodded, feeling somewhat encouraged to continue on by Brenda's understanding. "We were talking, and he tried to…he got to close and was trying to be charming even as I told him to stop and leave. That's when I smelled the alcohol on his breath. I shoved him away and tried to make it to my purse, but he grabbed my hair and threw me on the ground." Sharon paused, and Brenda gave her a reassuring squeeze while wondering where the hell the paramedics were. "He got to my purse first. And my gun. He threw my cuffs at me and made me cuff myself to the bed…and I tried to fight him off."

"I WANT TO SEE HER NOW! SHARON!" Rusty's scream could be heard all the way on the first floor Brenda reckoned.

"Rusty…" Sharon moved to stand, her own injuries forgotten as she heard the panic in her foster son's voice.

Brenda held her back gently, though. "He'll be okay. Fritz is with him. You need to stay still until the paramedics arrive." Biting back a sigh, Brenda added, "Which should be soon."

For a moment Brenda thought the incredible strong woman she called friend would fight her on the matter, but instead Sharon settled back down on the floor.

"I couldn't fight him off. And then while he was…" Sharon paused to swallow and tried to steel herself for what she had to say next. "…while he was…raping me..." The last of her words was said quietly as though Sharon couldn't wrap her head around the idea that Jack would do that to her despite the evidence. "…he stopped moving and grabbed his arm… he tried to scream, but …his lips were already blue…and he just…fell on top of me."

"SHARON!" Rusty screamed again from a nearby room.

Sharon closed her eyes at hearing Rusty scream her name, and Brenda could feel her fighting against the urge to go to the distressed boy.

Suddenly, other voices could be heard, and the door to the bedroom was opened by paramedics who went to the dead man first. Brenda wanted to scream at them, but the heartbreaking look on Sharon's face stopped her. It didn't take them long to realize that their patient was the woman sitting on the other side of the room against the wall, not the man dead of cardiac arrest.

Brenda held Sharon's hand as she answered the paramedic's questions and stayed out of the way as much as possible while trying to be reassuring to the police captain. Quickly, the paramedics placed Sharon on a stretcher and began moving her out of the bedroom. Brenda reassured the paramedics she _would_ be accompanying Sharon to the hospital. In the hallway, Fritz was standing outside of Rusty's door, and Brenda wondered what it had taken to get the teenager in there.

"Provenza should be here any minute," Fritz called after Brenda. "I'll take care of Rusty. Call me when you get to the hospital."

"I will," Brenda reassured him, and he heard a heartfelt "thank you" from Sharon as they continued out of the condo.

Fritz heard Provenza's voice coming from the living room, but couldn't make out what the older man was saying. Fritz guessed the lieutenant spoke to Sharon and Brenda briefly before he made an appearance in the hallway. The old lieutenant stopped outside Sharon's bedroom door and glanced at Fritz before stepping inside the room. He emerged a moment later looking as angry as Fritz had ever seen him and closed the door behind him using his handkerchief.

"Her husband did that to her?" the lieutenant ground out, not so much in shock since he'd seen worse after all and at least Sharon was alive, but utter disgust for the dead man in Sharon's bedroom.

"Husband?" Fritz repeated. He knew, of course, that Captain Raydor was separated from her husband, but he'd never met the man or even seen a picture of him. "That's her husband?" he asked in a shocked whisper, not wanting Rusty to hear the conversation through the closed door.

"Jack Raydor. Yeah, her husband." Provenza paused and cleared his throat, gesturing to the door. "The kid in there?"

"Yes, against his will."

Provenza's eyebrows went up, and he shook his head a bit before speaking. "You'd better get him out of here before this place is overrun."

Turning to the door, Fritz yelled through it. "Rusty?"

"Can I see Sharon now?" The door opened slowly. And the kid looked and sounded so small to the wizened lieutenant, not unlike a young child asking for his mother.

"Not yet," Fritz answered. "We're going to wait out in the hallway for a while and wait for Brenda to call from the hospital."

"She's going to be okay, though, right?"

"She'll be fine, Rusty," Provenza reassured the teenager. "That woman is too stubborn to be anything other than fine."

Rusty half smiled a little at the lieutenant's words, and Fritz snorted. They all knew just how true the lieutenant's words were.

Provenza cleared his throat again. "Go on. Out. This is a LAPD matter. No FBI and definitely no civilians."

Rusty rolled his eyes while Fritz smirked, as they walked down the hall, past Sharon's closed bedroom door, and out of the condo.

Provenza closed his eyes and waited for the rest of the team and the coroner to arrive.

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Please, let me know your thoughts! How do you feel about Sharon's reaction so far?


	2. The Kids

**UPDATE!:** So, I posted this story in completion. I'm changing my mind. Well, more like, I'm adding a few scenes, and doing some editing. I'll be sure to mention at the beginning of each chapter if there's new content, so you don't have to reread it if you don't want to.

There's no new content in this chapter, with the exception of a few minor wording changes and a couple new sentence near the end.

* * *

Five Months Later

**The Kids**

Sharon stood just inside the living room where she could easily see its sleeping occupants. She felt a smile grow over her face, and she could only assume it was the sort of smile that a mother wears when watching her children sleep.

Her oldest son and daughter had come home for Christmas, and along with Rusty, had decided to spend Christmas Eve sleeping in the living room. She had a feeling this was going to become a tradition whenever the three of them got together. The lights from the Christmas tree softly lit the faces of her children who were spread out haphazardly around the furniture. If Santa Claus really needed to get to the Christmas tree, he'd have a hard time not stepping on one of them.

Without being able to stop it, the memory of the first time her kids slept together in her living room returned to her. The circumstances were not something she liked to remember.

_"Mom, you cannot keep sleeping on the couch every night. I know what happened was horrible, and that you don't want to sleep in your bedroom, but at least let me sleep in it. Or Ricky. Or switch rooms with Rusty," Sharon's daughter demanded, sounding eerily similar to Sharon herself._

You've no idea what happened in that bedroom_, Sharon thought. Telling her children she'd been assaulted by their father was difficult enough. Nothing could make her tell them that he'd raped her. Nothing. "Absolutely not." _

_"You're being ridiculous," her daughter repeated. She and Ricky had only just arrived a few hours ago and were more than surprised to find out their mother had been sleeping on the couch since her attack._

_Ricky and Rusty's heads moved back and forth between mother and daughter as though watching a very exciting tennis match. _

_"This conversation is over. I will be sleeping on the couch tonight. Rusty will be sleeping in his room. You and Ricky can sleep anywhere you'd like as long as it's not my bedroom." _

_Her daughter groaned and theatrically dropped onto the couch, but Ricky spoke up before Sharon could say anything. _

_"You really should take Rusty's room, and the three of us will camp out in here…watching movies and eating all the junk food that you claim not to have in the kitchen." _

_Sharon almost smiled when both Rusty and her daughter got identical looks on their faces. As though they just saw the perfect opening and were ready to move in for the kill. _

_"Yeah," Rusty contributed, "you should sleep in my room. Definitely. I don't mind!" _

_Sharon sat down gently on the couch, pushing her daughter's feet out of the way. She opened and closed her mouth a couple of times while trying to think of an argument. She was sure there was one. But she was so tired. It was only two days ago that she'd been to the morgue to see her husband's body, and the pain from everything that had happened was still so fresh. She still had a black-eye, and split lip. As well as a litany of bruises she saw whenever she showered._

_Ricky got up from his chair and crammed himself between his mom and his sister. "Mom, you look horrible. Like you haven't slept in ages." _

_Sharon barely had the energy to glare at him._

_"Rusty doesn't mind if you sleep in his room, and…I think if I tried, I could carry you into his room." Ricky directed his next question at his sister and Rusty. "What do you guys think?" _

_Sharon found energy to raise an eyebrow and glare at her oldest son while her other two children cheered him on. _

_Ricky smirked. It was his father's smirk. "All right," Sharon said, seeing this as her chance to get something out of them she wanted very badly. Her children cheered instantly. "But…" Immediately, loud groans rang out, but she ignored them. "You will attend your father's funeral tomorrow afternoon." _

_The lighthearted mood in the room changed dramatically. _

_"No deal," her daughter stated empathetically, as Ricky moved back to the chair he'd vacated earlier. "Forgetting the fact that he _beat the shit out of you_ not that long ago—"_

_"Language," Sharon admonished automatically._

_"Forgetting that detail for a moment. He could never be bothered to show up for me or Ricky. Not to graduation or recitals…nothing. Why should we make the effort for him?" _

_This was a question that Sharon knew the answer to, and after having so many unanswered ones she was happy to reply. "Because you, all three of you, are better than he was. It may be true that your father has done nothing to deserve it, but I know you're the sort of people who can…do the right thing for him and me, despite that." _

_Sharon watched her children. Her boys seemed ready to cave, but her daughter…well, Sharon sometimes wondered how she managed to raise a child who behaved so much like Brenda Leigh Johnson. _

_"For you, Mom, and only for you," her daughter said determinedly. "How can we say 'no' to you when you have black-eye and split-lip, after all." _

_It was more than she had hoped for. "Okay… Thank you…" She looked at each of her kids. "I love you." _

_Standing up, she headed for the hallway and Rusty's bedroom, her kid's various replies of "love you, too" echoing behind her._

_She, pointedly, did not look at her bedroom door._

She would never admit to her children how wonderful it felt to sleep in a real bed that night. Not that she'd slept that long before waking up to check on them. Seeing them spread out haphazardly on the floor caused her to truly smile for the first since her husband had attacked her.

The next day her children had gone to Jack's funeral without too much complaining or snide remarks for which she'd been very grateful. The funeral had been a very small and very Catholic affair. She'd planned only herself, her kids, and Jack's brother being there, so when she arrived with her not quite pouting children and saw her entire team, Andrea Hobbs, Chief Taylor, Brenda, and Fritz there she was a little more than surprised. But not ungrateful. Afterwards they'd all given her hugs and told her to call if she needed them for anything at all. She'd been touched and had barely trusted herself to speak.

She wasn't sure which of one on her team had given her children a lecture about their obviously displeased attitudes, but she was sure one of them had due to the embarrassed looks all of the kids wore during the drive home. She was incredibly grateful for that as well. All three of them had seemed much more understanding of how she felt after the funeral. Going as far as offering to make diner.

An offer she'd partially accepted. It had been fun cooking with all three of her kids crammed into her small kitchen to 'help'.

That night they'd once again insisted she take Rusty's room since she still refused to sleep in her own.

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Please, let me know your thoughts! What do you think of the kids?


	3. The Morgue

**UPDATE!:** So, I posted this story in completion. I'm changing my mind. Well, more like, I'm adding a few scenes, and doing some editing. I'll be sure to mention at the beginning of each chapter if there's new content, so you don't have to reread it if you don't want to.

Again, there's no new content in this chapter, with the exception of a few minor wording changes, and a few new sentences.

* * *

**The Morgue**

Carefully, so she didn't accidently step on one of her children, she tip-toed from the hallway to the couch. Her throw pillows were being used by her children in various ways, so she contented herself with crossing her arms loosely as she sat down.

Jack's funeral had been the easy part. Claiming his body from the morgue had been much more difficult.

_"Look, Sharon," Flynn said softly as they stood outside of the autopsy room. "You don't have to do this. All you have to do is sign the paperwork; you don't have to come down here. You know what autopsy is like, I don't have to tell you." _

_"As much as it pains me to say this," Provenza added. "Flynn's right." _

_"I know," she'd said quietly, "and I appreciate your concern." She looked at both of them for little bit and tried to force a small smile. From the looks on their faces, she guessed her smile wasn't convincing. _

_Before she could lose her determination, she brushed past the duo, and into the autopsy room. _

_Doctor Morales offered her his condolences immediately and started explaining what caused Jack's heart attack with her husband's body laid out on the autopsy table. She could only stare at Jack while half listening to the doctor._

_ She hadn't known he'd been on any blood pressure medication, let alone an experimental one. An experimental one that when mixed with alcohol could in a small number a cases cause a psychotic break, and, ironically enough, cardiac failure. Jack had picked a hell of a time to fall off the wagon._

_"I'll just leave you alone for a few minutes, then." the doctor said quietly, having noticed she was all but ignoring him._

_"Thank you, Doctor," Sharon replied automatically, and was only vaguely aware of the door closing behind him. _

_Jack's body was covered in cuts and bruises. She had fought back that much was obvious. She didn't remember putting all those scratches on his face, around his eyes, but was sure that he hadn't come into her apartment with them. He'd be buried with all the marks she'd put on his body. _

_As she stood over him, she couldn't stop the thoughts that assaulted her mind in waves, one after another. They seemed to be crushing her, and she could do nothing to stop them. Just as she couldn't do anything to stop Jack. It was her fault. She'd served him divorce papers which had caused him to drink. It was her fault. Maybe if she'd just gone along with him. It was all her fault. It was her fault that her husband was dead. That the father of two of her children was lying on an autopsy table and would be buried bruised and scratched because of her. It was all her fault._

_The logical voice in her head kept screaming at her that it wasn't her fault. But it was being drowned out by everything else. She tried clinging to it like a life raft, but even the raft was being pulled under by each wave of guilt, doubt, and shame. _

_She could feel a sob rising in her throat, but ruthlessly pushed it down. Looking up at the ceiling, she tried to regain control of her thoughts. She was being ridiculous. She wasn't responsible for Jack's decisions. She knew that. She'd done everything she could to help him. She'd done her best to fight him off her. _

_She shielded her children. _

_She had also enabled him._

_Taking several deep breaths, she turned away from Jack's body and left the autopsy room. She was not prepared for what waited for her outside. _

_Her entire team as well as Chief Taylor and Doctor Morales were waiting in the hallway. Her legs felt weak, but she fought against their trembling. Wrapping her arms around herself, she swallowed against the rising panic as they all moved in closer to her. Too close. _

_"Are you all right, Captain?" Amy asked quietly._

_"Of course, she's not alright, Sykes! What the hell kinda question is that?" Provenza reprimanded the idiotic query. _

_"Sharon, why don't you sit down for a minute?" Chief Taylor said, she appeared ready to fall down at any moment. Intending to guide her to a chair he gently placed a hand on her elbow. _

_"Don't touch me!" Sharon heard herself snap even as she jerked her arm away from him, her entire body going stiff as her heart began racing. _

_Everyone seemed to freeze for an instant. The constant hum of the morgue refrigerators echoed in Sharon's ears, and she forced her lungs to fill a large breath of air. That was not a reaction she'd expected from herself. _

_"I'm sorry," Taylor apologized and took a small step back holding both hands up slightly. No one would make direct eye contact with her as though sensing her embarrassment and not wanting to add to it. _

_She couldn't think what to do next. Closing her eyes, she took a few shaky breaths and tried to force herself to calm down. Opening her eyes a few seconds later, she found Julio standing in front of her. Not close enough to make her more uncomfortable, but close enough to block most of the others from sight. _

_"Would you like me to drive you home, ma'am?" he asked, looking her directly in the eye. _

_"No." Her voice shook, so she cleared her throat. "No, I'm okay. Thank you." _

_Julio nodded and stepped off to the side, and though she couldn't see it Sharon was sure he gave the others a look that told them to get out of the way because they parted for her, leaving her a clear path to the elevator. She pushed the button and the elevator doors opened instantly, as the elevator was already on that floor._

_Before stepping into the elevator, she turned back to her team. "Thank you for everything you've done for me. I appreciate it. Really. Thank you." Stepping into the elevator, she pushed the button that would take her to the parking garage. _

Sharon shook her head to clear it of that memory. She had no idea how she'd made it out to her car. But once seated inside it, with the doors locked, and facing a dark cement wall she could not stop the tears. It had been the first time she'd allowed herself to cry. She hadn't sob noisily, even in the privacy of her own car, but leaning her head back, and clinging to her purse, she had let the tears silently roll down her cheeks as her whole body had trembled.

Once the tears had stopped, she had called the LAPD psychologist and made an appointment before she could convince herself, again, that she didn't need to speak to a therapist. When she finally arrived home much later, she called her two oldest children and told them what had happened. An edited version of what had happened. They'd immediately made plans to come home.

That had happened just over five months ago. Her children had returned to their own homes not long after they had helped her clean out Jack's place. Then it had been just her and Rusty again, but she still hadn't been able to bring herself to sleep in her bedroom. She'd told Rusty she was fine and had eagerly given him his room back after her two oldest left. But she had slept on the couch going into her bedroom only when she needed something out of it for several weeks.

Rusty hadn't believed that refusing to sleep in one's own room was normal behavior, however, and falling short of being able to convince her of that himself had told her other children that she still slept on her couch. Her children arranged what she could best describe as an intervention which seemed rather surreal with two of her children on Skype and one next to her at the table. She'd spent more than an hour convincing them that she was seeing a psychologist, 'yes' she'd told the psychologist that she wasn't able to sleep in her bed, yet, and that she just needed a little more time because she was getting better. Just because the bruises had healed didn't mean there weren't other scars.

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So...yeah...this chapter...Thoughts? Feels?


	4. The Team

**UPDATE!:** So, I posted this story in completion. I'm changing my mind. Well, more like, I'm adding a few scenes, and doing some editing. I'll be sure to mention at the beginning of each chapter if there's new content, so you don't have to reread it if you don't want to.

**NEW SCENE!**  
The first two paragraphs may sound familiar, but the rest is new.

* * *

**The Team**

Eventually, she had slept in her bedroom again. However, even now it could still be difficult. Sometimes, like tonight, when the memories just wouldn't let her fall asleep. Selfishly, she wished all her kids still lived with her, because watching them sleep soundly was soothing. Comforting even. She would never tell them that. Two of them had lives and homes of their own and didn't need to worry about her. Her youngest had been through so much already in his young life and was only just now about to start building his own future. None of them deserved to have to worry about her.

Her team had been nothing short of remarkable. They'd been supportive, but not overbearing. Silently supportive one could say, which was a welcome relief. They'd let her work without asking questions, but each had made it known in other ways that they were there for her. Even if they hadn't explicitly wanted her to know that.

_Sharon was getting used to the looks she got as she walked through LAPD headquarters. It made her miss the days when she was just ignored by everyone. She knew that everyone on the force knew what had happened to her. Word traveled fast amongst police officers, and she had no illusions that some of them probably thought she'd gotten exactly what she'd deserved. It always made the trip to the ninth floor interesting. _

_Today wasn't as horrible as it could have been. She'd had the elevator all to herself the entire way up. Stepping out of the elevator, she made her way to her office as a yawn escaped her. She considered stopping by the break room for coffee, but decided to put her things away first._

_She took her time settling into her office that morning before going for coffee, not yet awake enough to delve into the paperwork piling up on her desk. She didn't notice when the patrol officer came into the murder room, nor did she know why he was there, and she had no idea how she came up in conversation, but as she took a single step outside of her office, determined to get her coffee, she had heard the last bit of what he said. _

_"…Ice Queen needed a good lay anyway…"_

_She froze in her doorway. Knowing that these comments were being said behind her back and hearing someone say that about her, to someone on her own team were two very different_ _things. The shock wore off quickly, however, and she was just about to storm over and show the patrol officer just how true every rumor he'd heard about her really was- when Provenza's voice stopped her dead in her tracks. _

_The rest of her team had seen her come out of her office, but Provenza's back was to her, and the officer was turned to the side looking through some papers. Neither had any idea she'd heard what the patrol officer had said. _

_"Is that so, Officer…" the lieutenant made a point of reading the young man's name badge, "Capuzzo."_

_Capuzzo wasn't very bright, "Yeah," the officer continued, oblivious to the warning in Provenza's voice. "I don't envy you guys working for her. I hear she's the biggest bitch in the building. That she even outdid Chief Johnson in that category." _

_"Have you ever been to sensitivity training, Capuzzo?" _

_"Yeah, four times, now…"_

_"That's good. So I won't have to tell you what floor to find it on. I think a 30 day program should do it. What do you think, Flynn?" _

_Flynn stopped watching Sharon for a reaction for a moment to join his partner. "Sounds like he's getting off a bit easy to me." Flynn put on his best disarming smile. "Hey, maybe we_ _should call Professional Standards, you know, the department Captain Raydor used to run, and open an investigation into Officer Capuzzo's conduct?"_

_"Excellent idea, Flynn. Excellent idea! Wish I'd thought of it myself," Provenza replied jovially as though this was the most enjoyable conversation he'd had today. He turned sideways a bit and noticed his Captain for the first time. He cleared his throat. "In addition to the 30 days of sensitivity training that I'm ordering you to report to, Officer Capuzzo, I'm also required to inform you, as a commanding officer, that I will be calling Professional Standards and requesting they perform an investigation of your conduct. And rest assured everyone here in Major Crimes will be calling down there to give their witness statements regarding how you referred to a commanding female officer." _

_Officer Capuzzo's mouth gaped stupidly open. _

_"Oh, and don't worry, I'll be calling your direct commanding officer as well. That would be Lieutenant Mary Roach, if I'm not mistaken, and informing her of our conversation here today, as well. I wouldn't want you to have to break the news to her yourself." Provenza's ability to smile throughout this conversation was making her team grin right along with him. She even felt her own lips pull up at the corners._

_When the patrol officer seemed to be having difficulties knowing what to do next, Sharon decided it was time for her to step in. "Officer Capuzzo," she said in her most friendly tone walking up to the man as though she hadn't just heard the entire conversation. "Did you have something you wished to discuss with me? Or did the Lieutenant already help you with what you needed?" _

_Startled, Capuzzo cleared his throat, "Er…no, the Lieutenant got me everything I needed." _

_"Ma'am," Provenza and Flynn stated at the same time. _

_Sharon smiled at the now terrified officer in front of her. It seemed to scare him a little more. Good. _

_When Capuzzo didn't say anything, Flynn spelled it out for him. "She is a commanding officer. You will address her as "ma'am", Capuzzo. Got it?" _

_"Umm, yeah…yes…yes sir."_

_Flynn and Provenza both gave him a pointedly expectant looks. _

_He turned to face Raydor, "No, ma'am, the Lieutenant assisted me with everything." _

_"Very good," Raydor replied with a smile that all her officers knew meant anything other than 'good.' "And next time you come into my Murder Room, Officer Capuzzo, and feel the desire to comment on my personal affairs, please, by all means, do it to my face so I can have the privilege of calling Professional Standards myself."_

_Capuzzo turned a very undignified shade of red at her words. She actually had no desire to call Professional Standards herself, but Capuzzo didn't need to know that. _

_"Yes, ma'am," Capuzzo managed to say finally. _

_She nodded once before glancing to Provenza, "Is there anything else you wished to say to Officer Capuzzo, Lieutenant?"_

_"No, Captain, I think we've covered everything."_

_"Good. You're dismissed, Capuzzo." Sharon glared at his back as he all but ran out of the Murder Room._

_Once he was gone, she sighed a little. "I could use a coffee. Anyone else?" _

Sometimes she couldn't believe their loyalty to her. It had been hard won, of course, but knowing she'd earned it merely caused her to value it more. Her team had been...well, _her _team.

They'd had to partner with FID to investigate what happened at her condo. Assaults on officers were handled by Major Crimes after all, but throw a dead civilian in and immediately FID was called. Brenda assured her that the temporary partnership went well. Well…better than their forced partnerships used to go, anyway. They'd shared a laugh at that.

* * *

Well? What do you think?


End file.
